One of Sour, Two of Sweet.....

One of Sour, Two of Sweet, Three of Strong, Four of Weak....

At least that is the Mnemonic used to figure out the basics to a good cocktail.

Except....

There is a bit of poetic rhyming in the above formula but if you actually look at a lot of classic cocktails you will find the first two are switched. To wit, the classic Whiskey Sour:

1 part gomme (sugar)
2 parts Lemon
3 parts Whiskey

And presumably you would get your four of weak from the shaker. One of sweet, two of sour....

No?

Lets try the classic Daiquiri:

1 part Sweet
2 parts Lime
3 parts Strong

And again, the four of weak come from the shaker. One of sweet, two of sour...

Of course by pointing this out I am sure you are going to notice all the other drinks that have two sweets to one sour, but those drinks always seem too sweet for me.

I guess that as I become more and more of a bitter old man my cocktails are following me down that same path of bitterness.

Why do you hate us el Jimador?

Because nothing says Margarita more than cracking a cold one!

From their website:

The first line of ready-to-drink tequila cocktails, New Mix is the perfect combination of authentic el Jimador Tequila and refreshing flavors including: Paloma (grapefruit soda), Margarita, Spicy Mango Margarita, Vampiro (kind of Bloody Mary-ish) and Batanga (cola with some zing). These lightly carbonated tequila cocktails are the perfect way to ease into any party occasion.
New Mix available only in selected states. Lo siento.

First, who came up with the bright idea to lightly carbonate a Margarita? And can we beat them with a bag of limes?

And what part of a Margarita is so difficult that it needs to be pre-packaged into a six-pack? It is One part triple-sec, two parts lime, three parts good tequila. Shake the hell out of it and pour it in a cocktail glass or over the rocks. I could have made three of them in the time it took to type this paragraph.

I appreciate the effort, el Jimador, but please just focus on making good tequila. Leave the gimmicks to someone else.

Kingshead Pub - Sunrise

Went to the Pub the other night, had a pint with a friend and then had some dinner since it was about that time of day. The particular pub was the Kingshead Pub in Sunrise. Nice place, highly recommend it if you are thirsty and in that part of town.

I bet you'll never guess what I had for dinner?

Yup!

Fish and Chips.

And no, that picture over there to the left is not a picture of my dinner, it is just a nice picture I found on the internet from a Chip joint in Ontario. (Thank you Queen's for the picture, it is very nice and I am borrowing it)

Why did I not take a picture of my dinner? Because I make fun of people who do that. Come on... its fish and chips. Its some fish, and some chips, on a plate, in a pub. Have you lost all of your imagination?

Anyway..... Kingshead Pub in Sunrise... Fish and Chips.....

The fish was wonderfully firm and flaky, the batter was nicely done even if it was a wee bit bland. Maybe if they used a more flavorful beer to make the batter? The chips are good too. Cut from whole potatoes and fried so as to be crispy enough to eat but soft enough to enjoy.

They include on the dinner plate, and I presume on the lunch size too, a little plastic container of something sort of but not quite like a tartar sauce. It didn't really taste like anything so I switched to the HP Sauce for the chips.

I have a theory about condiments served in little tiny plastic cups with lids that I am still testing. Maybe someday I'll share it openly.

Overall?

I like the Pub, great place to hang out. I like their fish and chips and would give them a big thumbs up overall. I'm not going to recommend you go out of your way for them, but if you find yourself near by you won't be disappointed.

By the way.... there is another pub with the same name in Dania, but apparently that is owned by someone else so don't get the two confused when you are out and about.

Fish and Chips

I loves me some fish and chips. Not quite sure why..... There is no cultural or heritage connection for me and I wasn't fed fried foods overly much as a child. I just loves me a good fish and chips.

I'm still gonna spend far too much time talking about (and drinking) cocktails, just now I am going to include the occasional bit about fish. Or Chips. Or both.

And thanks to Road Food for the nice picture. This looks like it was probably pretty good.

F.U. T.S.A.

OK, I have gotten my knickers in a twist over the last week or so reading about the TSA's new security measures. Not really sure why, I only fly once or twice a year, and at last check my airport only has one of the passenger-microwaves so the odds are against me finding out what popcorn feels like while being nuked.

Like I said, I have my hackles up and the TSA can do no right by me in this state of mind. I read an article just now on the ABC website and this is what tipped me over the edge:

Pistole said. "I just feel bad for the rest of the traveling public that's trying to get home for the holidays to be with their loved ones."

Said in response to those choosing to participate in today's "National Opt-Out Day."

Mr Pistole, you are a douchebag.

If we would all just line up like good little boys and girls and do what the nice man says we can all get on the big airplane and have some cake and ice cream on our way to grandma's house.

I wonder if HTML5 is going to finally give us the missing Sarcasm tag so many blogs really need?

Seriously, Mr Pistole, you are a real douchebag!

You feel bad because someone who is going to stand up for their Rights and fight back against you over reaching your authority is now going to inconvenience you and the others who are so willing to give up (or take away) our Individual Rights granted by the Constitution of the United States.

Efff Uuuuu!

Trader Vic's Island Bar & Grill

It's been a long weekend, I'm tired, I'm going to cheat and just link to another site where I shared my opinion of the new Trader Vic's Island Bar & Grill in Sarasota.


http://fraternalorderofmoai.org/huimalu/viewtopic.php?f=9&t=9720

Or, directly to the company's website at http://tvislandbarandgrill.com/

More Cocktail Fail

Yes, more pre-packaged Cocktail Fail.....

Its a Martini.

How friggn hard is it to stir some Gin and Vermouth together with ice? And if you want to do it right, its only a dash more work with some bitters.

I know, you don't normally carry Gin and Vermouth around in your pockets, the ice tends to get all melty and run down the side of your pants leg..... That is a hint that you are probably not in a place where it is appropriate to be drinking a Martini.

Do not get me started on the "Vodka Flavored" version.

Cocktail fail!

A Strawberry Daiquiri, a Margarita Margarita, and a Pina Colada Pina Colada.

Ok, that is not really what they are, it just looks that way because of the graphic and type treatment of the packaging.

I think this idea is pretty neat. And in Original Ice's defense the page I pulled this image from listed the "Top 5 Things to Do On Your Bachelorette's"

Side note... my dirty little mind added all kinds of things to the end of that incomplete sentence.

Don't get me wrong, I am not hating on Original Ice. I like the Brand and the Company, this is a pretty ingenious idea. I haven't, however, tried the product so I will have to go with the reviews of others. I do give Original Ice extra bonus points for not calling these cocktails. They call them "Spirit Coolers."

The still represent Cocktail Fail..... Lemmesplain....

First, I do not like pre-packaged cocktails. Period. Horrible idea. Don't do it. Bad.

Second, the fact that your market (one of them at least) is the Bachelorette's is a pretty big Fail all by itself. It is pretty hard to say "Enjoy Responsibly" and the attach your product to a "Pole Dancing Party" or "Male Dancers Party" with the implied goal of getting stupid drunk so that the next day you can reclaim your innocence by blaming the alcohol from the night before.

I understand you have to market your product in order to sell your product, I just don't like targeting your product, any alcohol product, to a group of people who seem to have the singular goal of getting stupid and dangerously drunk. Drinking is the goal, not getting drunk. Enjoy the drink, enjoy the buzz, don't waste it by getting so pissed you have to rely on photos to know what you did the night before.

I guess the real reason I keep harping on these kinds of products is because I can envision the day, quite soon really, when some politician's kid gets into some kind of trouble after taking down too many juice-boxes of booze and deciding that Alcohol is far too easy to lay hands on and should be taxed and legislated and a whole bunch of other horrible things that will make it that much harder me to get good ingredients for my Mai Tais. I already have a hard time getting some quality rums because I am in a Distributor State so if the Distributor doesn't think they can profit they don't carry.

Anyway, that's all I got for tonight. Thanks for reading.

The Olive.....

First, thank you to Esquire for the great shot. The article attached to it can be found here .

A nice olive, or three, dropped into a Vodka Martini. Yum.

When did the Olive take over the Martini as 'The' garnish?

No, that's not a lead in to a story, its a question..... When did it happen?

Airport Hookup

Cocktail Aiport Pickup
Originally uploaded by Experiment 33 

OK I am a bit of a nutcase.

Crazy even.

And most of my friends understand me, at least they say so to my face. I have never figured out why they look so terrified when they say that, but that is fodder for my 'other' blog.

Anyway, on a lark I decided that I would meet one of our friends at the airport with a cocktail in hand. A Mai Tai (natch!) in case your wondering, fresh mint and a pineapple spear, the whole works. I had the drink in one glass, the ice in another, and when I got close I did a quick shim-sham with the glasses and ta-da! It was fun. It made everyone laugh. It was a nice ender to what was otherwise not a pleasant trip for our traveling friend.

Then I did it again for two other friends flying into town.

Then again for the original friend on a return trip.

It is a lot of fun, good for a giggle, and if you could have seen the looks the Security gives me you would truly appreciate my still being here to post this and not sending letters to you via carrier pigeon from Gitmo.

I think what makes this idea even more fun is everyone else at the airport.

I pull into short term parking, get out of the car with a cocktail in hand. And not just a glass of something, a cocktail. Garnish, ice, liquor, the whole nine. People walking whatever direction stop and stare, make comments about what a great idea, and generally get a big smile on. Security looks really confused, like they want to call it in but aren't quite sure what to say to dispatch, so then they just decide to scowl. But they can't because they too want someone to greet them at the airport with a cocktail in hand because it is so apparent that I am bringing this cocktail to someone at the airport and not just walking around looking like Thursten Howell the Third.

I have to get more of my pictures fixed and posted up on the internets. The picture above is from my friend Experiment 33 when they took up my bit of silliness and met some guests at the airport with cocktails in hand. This is not a slight against them, well maybe a little, but they wimped out and went with sippy-style cups that were just slightly less obviously cocktails. In their defense, the couple in the shot was next headed to the Rental Car Counter and having a fully garnished Zombie in hand when checking out a car may not be a good thing.

Drink Presentation

YUMMY Flaming Shots!
Originally uploaded by Princess Pupule

First, thank you to Princess Pupule! Your camera is so much better than mine.

And then....

Can presentation make a bad drink more better?

This particular presentation is called a Russian Roulette and is not on the regular menu. It is a really fancy presentation for what is basically a Lemon Drop.... A shot of nice white rum topped with a lemon wheel dipped in sugar, then the whole thing is doused with 151 and set a blaze.

The drink is fine by itself so I am not banging on that particular drink, I am just using it as a great photographic example..... doesn't it just look like it is going to be something spectacular? All flame-ey and people stepping back from its flame-ey spectacularness. In person even more better because of the low-hanging thatch roof over the particular piece of bar that is on fire.

And all of that sensational fiery and dangerous presentation for what is, once the fire has gone out, a shot of rum with lemon.

So, what do you think? Can less than spectacular drinks be 'saved' by overly elaborate garnishes or presentations?

151?

IMGP1534
Originally uploaded by Princess Pupule

Hmmm.....

A drink that is full

With an overly elaborate garnish

with bottle inside a coozy

and a guy just off camera with a box of matches.....

What could possibly go wrong?

Well, nothing really. That was just the set up to a new drink a friend of mine is working on. He said it needed some oomph on the garnish and what has more oomph than a float of 151 and a match?

Oh, and a tip for you..... Some overproof rum labels don't make a very big deal about being overproof, like Lemon Hart. So to keep the burny ones separate from the drinky ones, use a bottle coozy or hang something on the neck of the bottle.

The only thing worse than trying to light 80 proof rum is an unexpected shot of 151.